Dismissal can mean a deep cut for those affected. Conducting termination interviews is a balancing act. Finding the right balance between personal openness and professional conduct is no easy task. This article highlights successful strategies for HR and managers to take into account the human aspects and maintain a corporate culture characterized by humanity.
Careful preparation remains of central importance.
On the one hand, terminations require a high degree of professionalism and certainty in order to communicate the impending separation objectively and clearly. On the other hand, sensitivity and empathy are required - a termination can mean a deep cut for the person affected. Thorough preparation is therefore essential.
An empathetic approach ensures that the human aspects are also taken into account and that a corporate culture characterized by humanity is maintained.
Personal emotional preparation is also particularly important. In order to ensure the necessary confidence in challenging situations in the context of a termination, comprehensive preparation for termination interviews is essential. This can mean making notes on each topic of discussion in advance so as not to lose the thread at the crucial moment. It is also advisable to clarify your own scope for action in advance and to consider what possible support could look like for those affected.
Acknowledge your own emotions
It is helpful to consciously recognize and accept your own emotions such as anxiety or feelings of guilt. This enables more conscious control of your own reactions during the conversation and strengthens your ability to self-regulate. This proves to be particularly important in critical termination interviews in order to avoid being unintentionally influenced or even irritated by the emotional dynamics of the interviewer.
Consciously pausing before the conversation and reflecting briefly can have a strengthening effect. How am I feeling at this moment? What feelings or sensations am I experiencing? Some people also find it useful to breathe consciously, deepen their breathing and pay particular attention to lengthening their exhalation. This simple exercise can reduce stress. This technique can also help during a conversation, allowing you to center yourself again and again and face the situation with more calm.
Cultivating empathy
You should take the time to put yourself in the shoes of the person affected and be aware that a dismissal is far more than just a career change. A termination is a drastic event that can have a profound impact on the personal well-being and life situation of the person affected. It should be borne in mind that such news is often accompanied by feelings of stress, uncertainty and perhaps even fear. It is important not only to recognize these emotional aspects, but also to take them into account in communication and behaviour during the conversation and to approach the other person with empathy. Showing genuine understanding for the situation of those affected and creating an atmosphere of respect and care - this is what is invaluable in such difficult times and is appreciated by those affected.
And yet: remembering that a dismissal is based on company decisions and is not personal can help to maintain a professional distance, handle the situation in an objective and balanced manner and at the same time respect the dignity of those affected.
Taking the reactions of those affected seriously
An important part of the preparation is also to imagine the possible reactions of those affected and to consider how you could and would like to react. The loss of a job can evoke strong emotions, which should be given appropriate space in the conversation. Different emotional reactions such as aggression, grief, withdrawal, distancing or denial require specific approaches. Common reaction patterns include the following:
Aggression/AttackThis reaction manifests itself through open, aggressive behavior, accompanied by increased muscular tension and loudness. The anger is often directed at something or someone. In this situation, it is crucial not to argue the point but to listen. De-escalation can be achieved by giving people the feeling that they are being understood by recognizing and naming their emotions.
Mourning/WineAnother strong reaction can be sadness or crying. Seeing someone sad or crying is not easy, even for professionals. The temptation to say comforting words such as "it's not that bad" or "it'll be okay" is great. However, these words rarely correspond to the reality that the other person is experiencing and are therefore rarely perceived as helpful. Here too, it can make more sense to take a break and give the emotion space. Handing over a handkerchief is a non-verbal gesture of support that most people are happy to accept.
Defensive/retreatThe other person falls silent or freezes and no longer responds when spoken to. This can be a specific stress reaction and the person affected may be in shock. People in shock are rarely able to absorb and process information. In this case, it can also make sense to give the other person time to process their feelings. Depending on the situation, organizing a trusted person to accompany the affected person home can also be supportive.
Distancing/denialThe interviewer shows little personal involvement and does not act appropriately to the situation. It is advisable to use open questions to involve the other person and evaluate how well they have understood the situation.
Termination as a business/negotiator: The terminated person tries to use the conversation to maximize their financial benefit. By clearly defining in advance what your negotiating framework is, you can also firmly state your limits during the meeting and communicate with the necessary clarity.
If you encounter strong emotional reactions in conversations that make it difficult or even impossible to continue the conversation in a structured way, it is helpful to ask the other person whether they feel able to continue the conversation or would like to continue it at another time. This not only shows respect by acknowledging the current reality of the other person, but also allows you to gently switch from the emotional to the factual level without your conversation partner feeling ignored by you.
Acknowledging and responding sensitively to different emotional reactions is therefore important in order to preserve the dignity of those affected and maintain a respectful atmosphere in challenging situations.
Mastering complex conversations in a professional context is an art that can be learned. Regular training, such as practical seminars with role plays, are ideal for this. By practising in simulated scenarios, participants can learn how to deal with stress and better control their reactions. Practical training and feedback help to gain confidence so that difficult conversations can be conducted with more composure and aplomb.
Conclusion
Conducting termination interviews is a challenging task. It requires the right balance between the necessary professionalism and real tact. On the one hand, things must be addressed clearly and unambiguously, but on the other hand it must never be forgotten that there is a person with feelings on the other side. Thorough preparation is helpful here. It's not just about planning the course of the conversation and taking notes, but also about preparing yourself for the emotional side of the conversation.
It is important to be aware that one's own emotional state is just as relevant as the ability to respond appropriately to the other person's possible reactions. Whether this is anger, sadness or shock - each of these reactions requires special empathy and an appropriate response.
The overarching goal is to conduct the conversation in such a way that both those affected and the company emerge from the situation with respect and dignity. This is not just about maintaining professionalism, but also about fostering a positive and supportive corporate culture even in the most difficult of times.
Article by Michael Hasler for the March 2024 issue of the HR-Profi newsletter.
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